Expectations are unrealized ideas!!!

Competing at your best in your worst day is what mental toughness is all about. 

Here is how you’ll destroy your confidence & mental toughness

Comparing yourself with others

People naturally compare themselves to other people, but when you do that, NO ONE CARES! Only you. 

Your stress level increases, and things may become worse if this other individual begins performing specific tasks better than you. That’s when your mind starts playing tricks on you.

For example, at TRYOUTS, you begin to observe everyone else, and self-doubt takes over your thought process. They won’t select me because I can’t do what the others do. I’m not as quick as they are, and so on. Everything looks to move quickly in your head, to the point that the pace of play appears to be faster and more difficult. It is inconsequential, yet it is really stressful when those ideas enter your head!!

STOP HURTING YOURSELF BY COMPARING YOU WITH SOMEONE ELSE. This is a ticking bomb waiting to go off and destroy your confidence & mental toughness at any time.

Expectations are too high

Some kids are raised to think that they are the BEST. Therefore, they must be BEST at everything: best grades, best schools, best teams, etc. Here’s another example: goalkeepers or field players who are taught to believe they are going to play Div I college, professionally, or on the US National Team, but here’s a problem: they are just 11 years old, but parents & children think this has to happen now! Seriously, I don’t have to say much about this statement other than, Is this the reality of life? This is going to be a tough road for someone like this!!

 Expectations are unrealized ideas. Work on things that you can control such as better fitness, technique, speed, vertical jumps, game knowledge, and growing physically & mentally.  If you have high expectations and something does not go your way, you will literally put yourself in a position to struggle. However, with a reasonable plan, you can accomplish anything. See our next point!!

PLANS with no options

There are a number of people that email me, telling me their stories about what some coaches or clubs tell their kids. For example, “if you play for this xyz team, or this level or ECNL or Academies, this will be the only way to get to college or Division I.” I have heard this so many times since I moved to the US & it is simply far from the truth.

If you have ONLY ONE PATH to get to your goal, you are at serious risk of being extremely disappointed.

If you have a goal, discover as many options as you can to get to your final destination. Having several options will give you the opportunity to deal with any obstacles or problems on your way to your goal. If one option fails, then you can quickly move on to the next option until you reach your goal…. Think OPTIONS.

Over confidence

Overconfidence will give you the illusion that you CAN’T LOSE.

 I have personally seen a number of young amateur goalkeepers and athletes play with confidence, but only when they are playing with great teams or belong to a team with great players. But the same athletes I’ve seen fall apart when his team is not great, to the point where they wanted to QUIT!!!

Be sure of your skills, techniques, & fitness, because that is under your control. However, you can’t control outcomes & results. Therefore, going into a game or a situation thinking that you already won could be extremely dangerous to your confidence or mental toughness when things are NOT going your way…. Stay focused!